Taoism dates back thousands of years and originated in China. Some think of it as a type of faith, whilst others consider it more a school of thought aligned with good health and long life. To give some definition to Taoism the word Tao translates, in literal terms to, “the way.” This refers to developing a deep understanding of our lives and our place within the world.
We can explore the facets of Taoist wisdom – it suggests we can better ourselves by enjoying a decent diet, following the principles of feng shui, indulging in meditation and studying martial arts. Developing an understanding of Qi Gong (a mindfulness of sorts, with a focus of breathing techniques and posture) is another recommendation.
So, how does Taoism help you in the quest for mastering the act of love-making? Taoism encourages some emphasis to be placed on gaining sexual wisdom, incorporating Taoist sexual practice. This is more casually referred to as “bedroom arts.” This relates to the way we can embrace energy and use it to enhance our sexual capabilities.
Understanding Qi and Jing.
Taoists base their philosophy on the fact that we each have vital energy (or Qi as it is referred to in Chinese medicine). Qi comes to us in many forms – we are born with it (it comes via our thoughts and from within us) and we also garner Qi or vital energy from our surroundings – the earth, from the air we breathe etc. Qi can be described as our very lifesource.
Jing is closely related to Qi, in the sense that Jing is actually the very essence of our lifesource – we could describe it as the fuel. This substance (Jing) provides energy and keeps us going, loss of Jing results in us grinding to a halt.
Think of yourself as a sleek new car, cruising along quite happily. You have Qi in the form of engine power and from zipping along the streets attracting admiring glances.
You leave for a long journey with plenty of fuel (Jing), but have developed an unfortunate leak that results in the loss of Jing. Eventually you can go no further – end of the road. The essence of your lifesource has ebbed away. What a waste of a shiny new motor!
There are many unhealthy lifestyle choices you can make that lead to a loss of Jing. In terms of Taoist sexual practice, it is believed that Jing can dissipate via bodily fluids, more specifically through semen. There are methods that can be used to augment and sustain bodily fluid, including controlling the rate at which semen is expelled from the body. We will explore methods for achieving this in more detail further on.
The balance of Yin and Yang
You may be familiar with Yin and Yang, it is quite a common concept – the black and white adjoining shapes symbolizing perfect balance. This notion is an imperative part of Taoist sexual practice – Yin being the female part and Yang the male. The interaction between male and female, Yin and Yang has great meaning and this carries over to sexual intercourse too. Sexual positions and the things you do while making love have an impact. It’s about finding the right pace, Yang (male) ensuring they do not steam toward climax before Yin (female) is ready. Find your sexual tempo, the correct balance and you will enjoy an equal level of enjoyment.
Male control of ejaculation and vital life force
So, can you regulate ejaculation (Jing) as a means to balance Yin and Yang and prevent depletion of your lifesource (Qi)? The answer is yes. Sexual energy can be retained, you can learn to govern ejaculation by a number of methods. These include belly breathing – a technique which involves deep, intentional breathing, starting the breath right from the belly area.
Contraction of the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle is also thought to a useful method and involves squeezing or tensing the pc muscle (stretches from your pubic bone to base of spine), this helps to improve the pelvic floor and strengthens muscles – with the bonus point of achieving a more solid erection. Exercises that focus on strengthening the PC muscles are called Kegels. For more info about kegels check out this post (Why women love men that do kegels).
A technique that can work alongside clenching the PC muscles involves applying pressure to the perineum. This is sometimes known as the million-dollar spot (the sensitive skin between your testicles and anus). If you apply the right amount of pleasure you can delay ejaculation but still experience an orgasm . Taoist believe by using this pressure point you will experience an innerjaculation which is when the semen is diverted back into the blood stream instead of ejaculating out of the penis. This method has still not been proven clinically to divert semen into the blood steam and may just divert it into the bladder which would be considered the same to not conserving semen and experiencing a full ejaculation.
Delicately pulling the testicles is another known method for controlling ejaculation. During sexual contact the testicles will rise up a little – gently pull them down and this should enable you to keep going for longer.
Taoism and the female form
It is thought that women suffer from a reduction in sexual energy due to giving birth and also during their menstruation cycle. There are sexual practices or “bedroom arts” that can be incorporated by women to assist with this. Pelvic floor exercises are a great way to reinforce the muscles of the vagina. There are devices available on the market that can help with this. The “Jade Egg” being one of them. This egg is inserted into the vagina, the wearer can then practice squeezing her sexual muscles. This helps to tone the pelvic floor, which in turn, contributes to a deeper and more fulfilling orgasm.
Can a Taoist approach really enhance love-making?
You don’t have to take an extreme approach but incorporating Taostic sexual practice can certainly improve love-making, as it illuminates the need for self-awareness. This mindful approach can help you to identify techniques to control ejaculation. And learning the art of connecting with your life force with your partner, leaving you both fulfilled and enhancing that sexual bond.