12 libido Killers: The Causes of Low sex drive in men

 If you as a man experience symptoms of low sex drive, you’re probably shocked and stupefied as to why that is. From puberty onwards, what drives men to success is exactly the sex drive which needs to be fulfilled. We do that by impressing the ladies both in the bedroom and outside of it.

But just like Austin Powers, everyone is prone to losing their mojo sometimes. In this article, you’ll learn the most common causes of mojo loss and easy to implement solutions that work.

1. stress

A large chunk of our sexuality is entangled with brain chemistry. Stress is usually caused by troubles we deal with in the outside world, to which our mind responds in a negative way. The brain receptors produce cortisol (the stress hormone) as a response, and this leads to a lowering of testosterone, but also anxiety and lethargy.

If you’re not careful, stress can really mess up your sex life as well. But should you stress out about it? That’s definitely the worst thing you can do. A far better solution is to focus on reducing the stress inhibitors in your daily life, and making your mind better equipped to deal with them.

Leading a healthy lifestyle, having fulfilling hobbies and interests, and practicing meditation on a daily basis for at least 20 minutes are all viable tactics that are sure to help. For more ways to reduce stress check out these posts.

The second libido killing culprit is closely associated with stress. It’s really a question of what comes first – the chicken or the egg? Stress or lack of sleep? Both will mess up your hormonal balance, lowering testosterone levels while increasing cortisol production (study link).

On top of that, most of your growth hormone production occurs while you sleep. Add to this list of problems a lack of energy and wishing to doze off throughout the day, and it’s easy to see why your mojo is under attack.

A recent study by the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute found testosterone levels dropped significantly in men who don’t get enough sleep—equivalent to aging 10-15 years. The study analyzed 10 healthy, lean guys, averaging around 24 years old. When deprived of sleep, their testosterone levels dropped by a whopping 10-15%.

So what can you do? There’s only one, lazy solution – sleep! Have a sleeping schedule that you follow religiously. Unless you picked up a cougar in the bar. In that case, all is forgiven.

If you need help improving your sleep check out this post (Sleeping Hacks For increased sex drive and testosterone levels).

3. Alcohol

While it’s definitely a good social crutch, alcohol can mess up your sexual performance in the short term and long term. There’s a term “whisky dick” for a good reason – alcohol will cause a limp one at the crucial moment on a night out. In the long term, alcohol creates a myriad of physical and mental problems.

In terms of libido issues, we have to trace it back to hormonal changes yet again. Alcohol lowers testosterone levels and increases estrogen (study). On top of that, a night out drinking is usually coupled with lack of sleep, another contributing factor.

Will a glass of wine or one beer hurt your libido? Most likely not. Will chugging a bottle of wine like a pirate of the Caribbean? Most definitely.

4. Self-Esteem Problems

If there’s anything women don’t appreciate, it’s lack of assertiveness and awkwardness. These issues are usually linked to self-esteem problems, which can have plenty of sources.

Whether it’s thinking you’re fat, too skinny, or that your weiner is too small – there are so many things all of us could worry about! But the fact remains – there’s more humans on this planet than there ever was. Whether the issues you’re worrying about are real or just in your head, when it comes to sexual attraction women respond the best to confidence.

How to change your mindset is another pair of shoes. Perhaps all you need to do is start going to the gym. Maybe you need to resolve some childhood trauma. In that case visit a psychologist and invest your time in developing a powerful mind through meditation techniques. Either way, when you bring back your confidence, a powerful libido will follow.

5. Porn

Although still disputed in the science circles, it does seem that many men unknowingly suffer from porn addiction. According to some research, frequently watching porn messes up your pleasure receptors in the brain, as you get an instant and quite a large reward of serotonin without doing anything productive.

This might provide you with a short-term fix or relaxation and happiness, but it changes the way you respond to sexual stimulus away from the screen. This in turn can cause less attraction from regular women, as you form unrealistic expectations for the opposite sex. It can lead to erectile dysfunction and developing various strange fetishes, as you look for a stronger serotonin fix through porn (study).

Getting rid of a porn addiction is quite difficult, but it can be accomplished. The “NoFap” movement online provides a lot of material and support for overcoming this addiction, and the general process involves abstaining for 90 days from porn and masturbation altogether, in order for the brain receptors to recover from the constant abuse.

6. Medication

Taking certain medication can also cause issues in the downstairs area. Some of them are antihistamines, antidepressants, blood pressure drugs, oral contraceptives, anti-HIV drugs and finasteride (study). If you’ve started taking some medication recently and you’re experiencing low libido, ask your doctor if there might be a connection between the two, and if there was an alternative drug you could use.

7. Low Testosterone

Most of the before mentioned reasons for low libido are actually caused by reducing the amount of free testosterone in your body. By leading a stress-free lifestyle, getting enough sleep, and reducing alcohol consumption, much of the potential causes can be nipped in the bud.

However, aging is one of the natural culprits, and sometimes even younger men experience testosterone decline for no apparent reasons.

In these cases, you can design a lifestyle that supports optimal hormonal growth. For many ways to increase your testosterone levels check out our increase testosterone section (link).

8. Relationship Wrecks

Sometimes none of the physical and mental issues are the problem. It simply boils down to relationship problems between the man and his missus. Perhaps the sex has gone stale, and the interest in it wanes with time. Becoming emotionally detached and closing off from each other can also lead to a cold bedroom.

How to solve these issues is of course, outside of the realm of possibilities of one article, and it also depends on each individual case. Some possible solutions are to spice up things in the bedroom. Maybe materializing a weird BDSM phantasy is all you need, and the temporary loss of mojo can prove to be a guiding star towards a richer sex life. Perhaps it’s got more to do with improving communication between the partners in everyday life. In that case, visiting a partners counselor can prove to be helpful as well.

9. Kids

Kids can really mess up one’s sex life, and inadvertently affect the man’s libido. There are multiple ways in which kids can play havoc with sexual performance. First of all, taking care of a child saps away a lot of energy, leaving you too tired to perform well in the bedroom. There is also the issue of added stress as you need to make more money to support the family. Time also plays a factor.

Before you might have had sex with your girlfriend throughout the day, anytime you felt like it. With kids in the house, there are added restrictions as to where and when you can let go and have some adult fun.

I’m not saying that kids are not a bundle of joy in their own way, but you should definitely not let them take control over all aspects of your life. If anything, at least add a date night with the lady once a week, and you’ll both be happier for it.

10. Depression

There are two ways in which depression can mess up your libido. First of all, it will make you tired and weak, destroying your ability to perform or desire sex. The other issue is when you try to treat it with medication (study). Most of the anti-depressants mess up your brain chemistry, making you feel “zoned out” while you’re on them.

Of course, they are not necessarily bad, and using them to transition out of a bad place can definitely help in some cases. However, if you’re depressed or recovering from depression, be aware that your libido will most likely return to it’s optimal state once you recover completely.

   11. Weight Gain

Go to your mirror and have a good look at your body. How much weight are you carrying around the waist area?

Weight gain is going to negatively impact your hormones, your internal organs, your blood circulation and your heart health. Which is not good for your sexual health and erection quality.

You need as much efficient blood flow going downstairs as possible.

Obesity lowers testosterone levels. For example, a 2007 study of 1,667 men ages 40 and above found that each one-point increase in BMI was associated with a 2% decrease in testosterone. In addition, a 2008 study of 1,862 men ages 30 and above found that waist circumference was an even stronger predictor of low testosterone levels than BMI. A four-inch increase in waist size increased a man’s odds of having a low testosterone level by 75%; for comparison, 10 years of aging increased the odds by only 36%. All in all, waist circumference was the strongest single predictor of developing symptoms of testosterone deficiency.

As a general guideline your waist size shouldn’t fall above 37 inches, aim for anywhere between 32  to 34 inches for a healthier body and more attractive physique.


Don’t ignore the facts,

According to a Harvard study which found that a man with a 42-inch waist is twice as likely to develop the problem as a gent with a 32-inch waist. Brazilian research also linked abdominal obesity to ED, but only in men older than 60. And a California study reported that having a BMI of 28 (overweight but not obese) increased a man’s odds of developing ED by over 90%.

  12. Bad food choices

I know you have heard it before but you really need to avoid trans fats. Consumption of too much trans fats is linked to lowered testosterone levels. Trans fatty acids are also known to lower the “good” HDL cholesterol. You need to keep HDL levels high as they are a crucial element in testosterone synthesis.

There are many foods you should try to avoid such as foods high in soy. Eating soy is known to boosts a man’s estrogen levels apparently. Even though studies are starting to conflict each other I would play it safe and still avoid foods and supplements that contain soy.


You have read them! Now make sure you don’t forget these libido killers. Remove these killers from your life and experience a new heightened level of sexual desire. Now you know what you need to avoid its time to check out this popular post (21 easiest ways to increase libido).